Twig comics are neat.

Here's another blast from the past comic I created for a friend. It's called...

We are still looking for it.

And now, here's a screen shot of that wacky show, "Where's my flopsidoodle?" coming soon to a blog that has grapes and udders in it's title.

Illustration Friday: Phobia

Cosmotiwoctophobia - The fear of being chased by an octopus in outer space on a Tuesday.

(Inspired by a a past drawing and comment.)

That's it?

Since there has been a serious lack of staff meetings, which have resulted in a serious lack of staff meeting sketches, which have resulted in a serious lack of Monday Night Staff Meeting Sketches Posts, I have decided to take actions into my own hands. You may now leave a comment in the form of a long, boring, uneventful staff meeting, and I promise to draw something during your comment. It will be almost like the real thing. Until that time, here's a guy in a turtleneck.

Little help here.

The little sign near the lower left says "An apple a day keeps the uglies away." Apparently, this guy hasn't had an apple in, like, 5 billion years!!!

Have a corpse on me.

Well, how about another corpse? I know, I know, you hear that everyday. Here's what I got...



Now, for the most part, I usually try to figure out what's going on in the slice given to me. I'll then either find images that I've done, or do some Google image searches and find what I need. Here are the images that I figured I want to use in my slice...






I ended up not useing the bath mat things. But, this is what I came up with...



Want to see the end result? Well, check it out!...



Makes you want to go on a jolly holiday, doesn't it?

I might have blown up or something.

Not to worry. I did not enter...even though I really wanted to!

(Sorry, no staff meeting this week. Fellow coworkers are traveling around the globe as we speak. Maybe next week. Maybe. May. Be.)

P.D.o.G.U. Guide to Fashion: Part 2

Looking for that style that says "I'm tall and made of metal?" Well don't overlook the suit from Elongated Armor Plating. With some of the most advanced features on the market, this one of a kind suit will shoot you to the head of the pack! Only $59.95. Colors: Silver, Gold, or "Darth Vadar" Black. Sizes: Toothpick.

With Fall just around the corner, make sure you start thinking about cooler weather, and the return of various pointing creatures. To give them something to point at, try the new "All Cotton Ball" ensemble. Made from 100% pure cotton balls, this set is extremely comfortable (unless you just shaved). Includes, hat, shirt, coat, pants, and socks. (Warning: Hat will shrink if exposed to sunlight, artificial light, rain, air, and pointing creatures.) Only $3.17. One size fits all, if you are 2'9".

Illustration Friday: Farm

The problem with being the smartest animal on the farm is that you have to put up with all the other stupid ones.

Monday Night Staff Meeting Sketch #13

The return of staff meetings! Thank goodness!

The art of staff meeting sketches can be first traced back to the plastonic period, where a certain caveman, named "Ugg," would just talk and talk and talk. (We know this, because he was dug up with his mouth wide open.) It seems that another caveman, called "Jegg," would get up and start drawing on the walls. These drawings can still be found in our office basement.

Unfortunately, Ugg was thrown into the sea, only to be devoured by a great propeller-monster of the deep.

Yes, he continued to talk.

Fortunately, Ugg received a vision inside the beast. It was from the ancient duck-bill spirit. He told Ugg to go find the rest of his body, if he can figure out how to get out of the sea monster.

Unfortunately, Ugg died in the belly of this creature, and was unable to comply with the floating, duck-bill spirit's request. Ugg died (with his mouth open) and his spirit turned into a star, as his cavemen friends all told him he would. Telescopes all over the world can now see Ugg, but thankfully not listen to him.

I don't know how this related to the story.

Fortunately, Ugg, now called Treegut 13b, has his own celestial bodies orbiting in cosmic order. One of the planets has been colonized by citizens of Treegut 11e, and here is a portion of their written language. It says "Mentos! The Freshmaker!"

Unfortunately, after colonization, the race regressed to a primitive state, and forgot what circular objects are used for.

Fortunately, one of these colonized idiots gave birth, and, to everyone's astonishment, had super powers. This new hero taught his race the importance of circular objects, as well as deodorant, and was hailed as the planet's first true superstar.

See what great things come of staff meeting sketches?

Would you like a corpse with that?

Time for my third corpse I did for The Exquisite Corpse game. Here was the slice that I received.



Yes, quite a simple one! I was free to come up with just about anything, as long as it had lots of orange in it. It was also my first time ending a corpse. Here's what I submitted.



And the final piece looks like...



This is what people had to say about it. Enjoy another masterfully composed corpse! (Or is that "masterfully decomposed corpse?") Har. Har. Hardee har har.

P.D.o.G.U. Guide to Fashion: Part 1

In order to further assist the hordes of people that visit this blog, I have decided to share the knowledge that I have in my cerebral matter concerning clothing styles. So grab your pen and paper, and let's begin.

Those that own any large domesticated animal that resembles a combination of Darth Vadar, Barney, and a dragon knows the importance of the Armless Poncho-shirt. Not only does it keep tempting appendages away from hungry mouths, but it makes a clear statement that says "I was not picked-on in grade school." Only $26.99. Colors: green, brown, and puce. Sizes: small-XXL

As monocles become more and more popular these days, I'm sure you want to find something that compliments your taste in modern thinking. Such is the case with the PlusCollar Robe. Not only does it give you instant appeal, it also hides embarrassing leg characteristics, such as Bloated Knee Capitis. Only $39.99. Color: "Evil Scientist" grey. Sizes: one size fits all. Hairy eyebrows and mustache included.

Look, an aardvark!

I thought I might share a few images of the wildlife I happen to see around my habitat each day. (I will leave out, however, the gruesomely vile ogre that lives in my mirror in the mornings.)

First we have Duane, the meditating mantis. (For reasons unknown, Duane has becoming an atheist, and feels that having the word "praying" in his name violates his rights and is politically incorrect.)

Here we have a very rare breed of horse called the Stillasastatue Horse. "Stilla" for short. She hardly ever moves. And I can attest to that. I once sat and watch her for 4 days straight. She didn't even flinch when I held up a sugar cube for her.

And I thought I'd save the most vicious one for last. I shudder just thinking about this monster. Ooooeeehhhh! Once I saw this beast eat a jogger like it was a dog biscuit. I don't have a formal name for him yet, but I've been thinking of calling him...Stuart.